Women (and men) should not be ashamed by infertility, miscarriages, pregnancy lost (early or late), stillborns babies, and any other thing that happens when it comes to making babies. I am not ashamed of the miscarriage I had on December 2010. I am not ashamed of the 7 clomid treatments that failed (three of those IUIs). And more importantly I am not ashamed of my diagnosis of diminished ovarian reserve (DOR) and my failed IVF in October. Logan and I decided after the initial diagnosis of DOR (with pretty bad numbers for a 28-year-old...like someone in their late 30's should have these numbers) that we would only do one IVF with my eggs (ended up only producing 2 follicles and so we changed it to an IUI) then move onto donor eggs. We are working with our fantastic fertility center in Houston to do a donor egg cycle. We have found a wonderful anonymous donor who is giving the best gift we could ever receive. We literally picked her the first day she was on the donor site (think match.com for egg donors). We are excited for the end of December to get this cycle going and are hoping for Baby Freeman in late 2013.
It's been a long journey full of heartbreak, lots of tears, tests (in places that never should be tested), two surgeries (one after my miscarriage for my gallbladder but it was completely failing and without that miscarriage we would not have discovered it and that pregnancy would have sucked) and another one to remove a cyst in November (and now there's another one on my left ovary). I have had many times that I've just completely felt alone and lost. I've had other times (like now) where I feel like I have everyone in my life behind us. I've been open on Facebook, to the Chi Omega's I advise as well as my fellow advisors. I've been open with my fellow leaders in the Brazos County A&M Club.
I've recently joined as an Independent Team Beachbody Coach. I have worked really hard to lose the 40 plus pounds I gained through this journey and I am committed to make an impact on others' lives through Beachbody. I will share a bit about my health and fitness journey. It's more about being healthy for me. I'm finally down to my pre-wedding weight and feel healthier than I have in a long time. I will talk a bit about my other health issues (kidney stones, migraines, etc...there are too many little things that have made this journey more difficult.
This is probably the worst written blog post ever, but I just wanted to let y'all know what to expect. I am excited to share our journey and be open, honest and unashamed of my infertility. I will start from the beginning and let y'all know updates as they come in. I shouldn't have any other news until middle to late December, so I will be telling our 2.5 year journey over the next couple of weeks.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your thoughts, prayers, messages, notes, emails and encouragement through the journey. It's not always easy for Logan and I, but I am hoping through this blog we can help other couples struggling with the same thing.
Kate: I'm so proud of you for starting this blog. Thank you for sharing your story. You're such a strong, determined, & beautiful woman and I'm blessed to know you. You're in my prayers as you continue on your journey. Sending lots of love your way!!!
ReplyDeleteHi Kate,
ReplyDeleteI'm really excited about your blog and can personally relate. We too had a miscarriage back in May and have now been officially TTC for a year and half total. I look forward to hearing how things go for y'all. We haven't gotten into fertility testing to find out what is really going on yet, but I think we may start that soon. Our options for all of that are a bit more limited over her in Okinawa. Keep us posted and you and Logan will be in my prayers. :)
On one hand, my heart breaks for you. On the other, I am in awe of your strength. We dipped our toes into the infertility realm with a PCOS diagnosis and several failed rounds of Clomid, then Femara. An increased dosage of Metformin by itself did the trick for us but I know so many that I know and love are not so lucky. Like I said on a FB post of yours recently, we need to do a better job of saying - hey, it's not always easy to have a baby - and we need to stand together and support along the journey. I am inspired by your strength. 2+ years is a LONG time to be on that emotional rollercoaster, especially with a miscarriage in the midst, and I am inspired by your determination to look into all possible options. I wish you the very best with this next round of IVF. I pray that you are carrying your precious little miracle in 2013 and experiencing the beauty of pregnancy and motherhood. My heart and prayers are with you and Logan. I look forward to reading more on your blog. SAAHE love. :-)
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